Living Life Beautifully

I went to lunch with my husband on monday to celebrate the first day of school.  We went to the Grist Mill and ate way too much food sitting in the dining area over looking the water.  As we were talking I noticed a couple walk through that obviously had money and were married.  The woman was a perfectly manicured with makeup and not one hair out of place, she had her expensive clothes and purse, and the grumpiest look on her face.  The husband looked exactly the same.  They probably live in a beautiful home and drive amazing cars, just based on how they looked and acted.  I felt kinda sorry for them. I have lived a huge chunk of my life thinking i had to be one way and trying so hard to make myself what other people thought I should be.  You are raised by your parents to be like them and they fuss and mold you and judge you if you aren't up to snuff.  They want you to be the best for your sake and so you won't embarrass them. I remember when i ...

I'm sitting here on the back deck with my hot tea, and about three cookies that I will allow myself   ;) , reading a journal by a woman who, at the time, was finding herself through a midlife crisis. (if you want to call it that) I'm reading her words, and how familiar they are to some of my thoughts in the past few years, and I read "holes are holy. Miracle vessels were you go in one thing and come out another."  That one line is so very powerful to hear. It is so true when you think about it. Life takes you through things and changes who you are. If it's a huge hole, then you learn a lot, if it's a small hole then you learn not to step in it again, if it takes a LONG time to get out of the hole, then you are probably going to be forever changed. THAT.... WAS THE FIRST PART OF A VERY LONG BLOG POST I TYPED UP EARLIER. SIGH...........   Now....... after this paragraph, I kept typing up this "Im doing much better now" page of self analysis...